For many years, like most young men in Australia, I participated in team sports. One of the many benefits of team sports is the social aspect of going out after a game and socializing with the rest of the team. This phenomenon started in my teens and continued until my early forties. Then life got in the way. Busy jobs, kids and their activities…you know the drill.
In these post match gatherings we always dissected the game that we had just played (in our case the game was basketball – but feel free to replace that sport with your sport of choice and I’m sure you will arrive at a similar scenario). Often the discussion about the game would be quite passionate and last three times as long as the game did. The discussions were always interspersed with much laughter and jocularity about how one of us did something unintentionally silly.
Sometimes there were injuries that required icing and our gathering place of choice (a pizza restaurant in Naremburn owned by an old friend) usually provided the ice pack and a spare seat to place your injured limb on. Rarely did the conversation turn negative. After many years of intermittently running into one another a core group of us decided to reconvene for dinner once a month or so. We’ve been meeting regularly now for a couple of years and in our last meeting we came up with a golden rule.
Before I go into that rule, let me give you some background: Two of our former team members have suffered heart attacks. Another two have semi-serious heart conditions (which apparently can be repaired), one had testicular cancer a few years ago and one (who also has a semi-serious heart condition) just ended a horrific marriage with the mother of his children – it turned out that she also had serious unresolved mental health issues. Our forum is a chance to speak openly to people that we trust unconditionally – away from the “experts”. Of good and bad things.
We found that at our last meeting too much negativity was creeping into our conversations. So, we created a “rule” (one of the guys just blurted out “really? Cardiologists”) that we would not discuss cardiologists in the group forum anymore. It was leading to a “my condition is worse than yours” competition amongst us and becoming a downer. Did I mention that we’re still all very competitive? Don’t get me wrong, we all look forward to our get-togethers. We got together at one of the guys’ houses for his birthday last night and quickly peeled off from the rest of the crowd (our long suffering wives) and were in fits of laughter immediately. So much so that our wives soon joined in the laughter and the night was better for it.
What does all this have to do with finance?
I’m glad you asked. Sometimes, when you’re unsure about your own financial situation and are carrying the burden in secret, it’s good to have a conversation with someone that does it for a living. It may be your accountant, a financial planner, a mortgage/finance broker or other financial expert. It’s good to share and get an opinion that has not been fermented in financial anxiety and stress. What you do with advice is completely up to you but at least you’ll be fully informed. Nick and I have a BDM assigned to us by our aggregator. Whilst we’re good at what we do, there are certain nuances of broking administration that we feel could be done better. So, we try and have a regular consultation with our BDM to get a second opinion and to hear how others may be doing things. So, before your financial burdens lead you to a cardiologist, you may want to unburden yourself and seek help. It can’t hurt and it’s usually free of charge.